the noise room

If Noise Room was a musician. .

Sat, 03 Oct 2009 04:04:42 -0400

. . it would be David Hasselhoff, only appreciated by those who have endured Communist rule in Eastern Germany…

. . it would be John Cage performing 4’33”, with some theatrics but very little substance…

. . it would be Michael Jackson, too dead to joke about.

Miley Cyrus:

Wed, 24 Jun 2009 08:00:00 -0400

A recent photo surfaced on the web which allegedly shows Miley Cyrus, the 16 year old music sensation behind Hannah Montana, performing fellatio on an unidentified man. If true this would prove that what goes in her mouth is actually worse than what comes out.

The Smiths

Wed, 17 Jun 2009 04:37:00 -0400

David: She & Him need to come out Volume 2 already.

Alex: No joke.

David: They covered a Smiths song for Zooey's new movie, 500 Days of Summer. I don't know if you are into The Smiths or not. I never got the big deal, but a lot of people are in LOVE with them.

Alex: Yeah, I've never really listened to them.

David: They were always very "ENGLAND YEAH!" and I dunno, I just always thought fuck England.

Acronyms Considered Before Settling With M.I.A

Sun, 31 May 2009 05:25:20 -0400

1. POW (Prisoner Of War)

2. AWOL (Away Without Leave)

3. FUBAR (Fucked Up Beyond All Repair)

4. RILF (Refugee I’d Like To Fuck)

Six Things We Wish We Could Blame On The Economy

Tue, 19 May 2009 18:16:00 -0400

Aerosmith’s $200+ ticket packages for their 2009 tour with ZZ Top

Online concert ticket giant Ticketmaster merging with online concert ticket giant LiveNation

RIAA bringing down media pirating torrent site ThePirateBay

People coming out of nowhere to try and get credit, and royalty, for Coldplay’s music

Creed getting back together

The quality of content published on this site

YouTube Quote of the Day

Thu, 14 May 2009 05:55:00 -0400

YouTube Quote of the Day

Other songs Coldplay's 'Viva La Vida' Plagiarised

Tue, 12 May 2009 02:13:19 -0400

Recently, musicians Joe Satriani, The Creaky Boards and Cat Stevens have accused British rock band Coldplay of plagirising elements of their songs. We’ve compiled a list of other artists who have also expressed their feelings that Coldplay has lifted from their material as well.

1. The phrase ‘Rule The World’ used in ‘Viva la Vida’s lyrics was directly lifted from Tears for Fears’ ‘Everybody Wants to Rule The World.’

2. The idea of their song and image being used in an Apple iPod ad was clearly lifted from Feist’s song and image being in an Apple iPod ad.

3. The usage of the phonetic sound “Ohhhhhh” as background vocals is strikingly similar to Prince’s orgasmic “Ohw!”s in ‘Kiss.’

4. Pianos and stringed instruments make up the core melody of ‘Viva La Vida;’ however, Danny Harris’ 3rd grade Orchestra recital employed this concept/arrangement 6 years ago, with Mrs. Rowley leading on piano with Danny and his peers supporting on violins and violas.

5. The band’s name “Coldplay” is a highly derivative of American ice cream parlor chain Coldstone Creamery.

6. The idea of a cocky, self-absorbed, attention-starved lead singer is nothing new, Bono of U2 has been doing it for years before Coldplay came about.

Conor Oberst and the Mystic Valley Band - Outer South

Mon, 04 May 2009 02:11:06 -0400

DAVID: Conor Oberst and the Mystic Valley Band, a project which came about as Conor tried so desperately to separate himself from his Bright Eyes roots, is back with their second album. It is a 14 track record that came close to sounding like one long song but is saved when the rest of the band decides to pull a little weight of their own. While I enjoyed the songs recorded by Conor, especially the biblically charged "To All The Lights In The Windows", it was refreshing to hear the different sounds of his band mates. The way it was refreshing to hear Paul after John overstayed his welcome. I particularly enjoyed Nik Freitas, the band's guitarist, and his song Big Black Nothing.

ALEX: The music is really solid. Definitely a well established sound. I'm not sure I'm that into the sound, it's a little too generic alt-country for me. But it's clear they are very good at what they do. Some of the vocal melodies are really nice, I just wish the music was more playful and experimental in some ways; I guess I just wish they jumped out of their well-formed box here and there for a little nice creative touch. That said, I enjoyed Macey Taylor's vocals on "Worldwide." Also, "Spoiled" was a really strong track for me; just really stripped down but enjoyable.

DAVID: A little more creativity wouldn't hurt. I am assuming, and I could be wrong, that Conor Oberst is focusing more on lyrics and less on the sound which, when you sound like Conor Oberst, is a pretty good idea. He impressed me more often than not, but I was let down when he tried to preach politics in the oversimplified track, Roosevelt Room. I got tired of the guitar and wouldn't mind some piano or more of Nate Walcott's trumpet which never fails to turn a mediocre song into something memorable. After the first lesson I was underwhelmed, but I gave it another chance and now I find myself listening to it throughout the day. After all, these are solid songs and an album with 14 solid tracks is nothing to complain about.

ALEX: Yeah, I dunno, I had a hard time not skipping through tracks. It's not that they are bad, it's just that there is nothing too interesting that is keeping me hooked to it for the whole song. Maybe it's just because I favor music over lyrics, but the album just isn't too special for me. Definitely not bad, it's still a good album, just doesn't really stand out for me too much.

Biography Of A Song: House Of The Rising Sun

Tue, 28 Apr 2009 14:25:00 -0400

No one is sure who first sang the song that is now known as House Of The Rising Sun but it goes back, as far as anyone can tell, to 1933 and probably years before that; sung by miners or whores or those who just were trying to earn a few bucks while working on a medicine show. At least that was the case of Clarence “Tom” Ashley who was the first one to record the song, alongside Doc Watson. Ashley claims his grandfather had taught him the song and it was one he performed often throughout Southern Appalachia in between black face comedy shows.

Four years went by and nothing much came of the song and it would have probably been forgotten, or left to the saloons and brothels, if it weren’t the chance meeting of Alan Lomax and Georgia Turner. Lomax, an American Folklorist, was working for the Library of Congress and his sole purpose was to find and document songs from the South. He had overhead the barely sixteen year old Georgia Turner singing a song she called “Risin’ Sun Blues” and they recorded it together.

This eventually lead to the song being covered by plenty of other folk artists— most notably Woody Guthrie and Bob Dylan.

Perhaps the most recognizable version was recorded by Eric Burdon and The Animals in 1964. Eric Burdon later claimed to have heard the song in a night club performed by British Folk Star, Johnny Handle and decided, while touring with Chuck Berry, to play the song which they had arranged to have a more rock n roll vibe and to fit the deep baritone voice of their lead singer.

This version was groundbreaking in two ways: first, the song’s length was a little over four minutes, something unheard of at the time of the two-minute-long-hits that controlled the radio waves, and secondly, the lyrics were shifted from being about a prostitute to being about a gambler, some say to make it more radio friendly, and suddenly the song found a much larger audience.

It was such a hit that whenever Bob Dylan tried to play his rendition during a live set he was often asked if he learned the song from The Animals and for years it was considered, without much argument, that Eric Burdon wrote the song.

There were many other covers from Joan Baez to Waylon Jennings to Frijed Pink to Muse.

The lyrics are always different, it is sometimes told through a prospective of a whore, a gambler or even a junkie and it is either directed at the narrator’s mother, father, brother or sister but the feeling of regret and the need for redemption is always there. And maybe that is the reason why this particular song will never grow old, no matter how many covers are out there.

Instances when the "their earlier stuff was better" is disproved

Mon, 27 Apr 2009 14:46:32 -0400

1. The Beatles

The White Stripes Bar Graph

Thu, 16 Apr 2009 02:13:16 -0400

Things To Say When You Know The Most About Music

Fri, 10 Apr 2009 21:08:00 -0400

“Their early stuff was better.”

“Yeah, I saw them way back in ______, they were just starting out. Now everyone’s into them.”

“I’m into a lot of post-_______ and _______-_______, a lot of bands you’ve probably never heard of.”

“[Legendary pioneer of a genre/style] is so overrated.”

“You listen to .mp3’s? Jesus, how primitive. Get on .FLAC/vinyl while I still have an ounce of respect for you.”

”________________ is so 2006.”

“[Genre]? That band is so NOT [genre] at all. Have you even HEARD them?”

“Ugh, I’m so over ______________ ever since they were on Gossip Girl.”

“You like ____________, ___________ and ______________? Such mindlessly simple music.”

“No, you’re a hipster.”

“Oh, you’re into _________________ too? Have you heard their [incredibly rare possibly non-existent bootleg/demo/alternate take]? No? I have like all that stuff. It’s so good. I’ll send it to you. [I won’t send it to you.]”

“I have like 86 gigs of music, but it’s not a big deal or anything.”

“Ugh, I hate the Beatles.”

The Mamas and the Papas If You Can Believe Your Eyes And...

Fri, 10 Apr 2009 14:39:00 -0400

The Mamas and the Papas
If You Can Believe Your Eyes And Ears

Possibilities:

1. The Mamas and the Papas are focused on cost-effective living, and take group baths to minimize utility costs.

2. The Mamas and the Papas are slightly smelly, as they don’t “get” the role of water in a bath.

3. The Mamas and the Papas are very needy and only feel secure when cuddling together in the tub.

4. The Mamas and the Papas are slightly delusional, 3 of the members believing they are actually water.

5. Despite popular rumor, it appears Mama Cass can in fact fit in a bathtub.

Silversun Pickups - Swoon

Thu, 09 Apr 2009 15:22:16 -0400

DAVID: Silversun Pickups is an American Indie Rock band famous for the effeminate, whiny vocals of Brian Aubert which fits, if you think about it, the whiny lyrics he sings. Sometimes, when I am bored with good music, I will imagine what it would sound like if the happy-go-lucky rock of the 90's met the downward spiral self loathing alternative rock of the present; I think Swoon, the band's second album, gives us the answer. It is Blink 182 meets Saddle Creek.

ALEX: I dunno if I'd go so far as to compare them to Blink 182, but Swoon is definitely bland and blurred together. Songs are hardly distinguishing from one another, each one feeling like a contrived attempt to recreate the success surrounding their first single, Lazy Eye. Each song just ends up sounding like a slightly tweaked version of the one before, the guitar's power chords trudging along with choppy 4/4 drums and a bass following the guitar's example simply hitting the root note for every chord. The only times any song got slightly interesting or stood out from the others for me was when synths and strings were inserted as padding, breaking up the monotony of the same ol same ol guitar/bass/drums backing.

DAVID: I guess the only thing I can say is that I just don't like their sound. Perhaps they are good at what they do, maybe they are fine musicians and maybe the singer has something to say, but I won't be listening.

ALEX: I will say this though -- I was legitimately surprised after seeing a music video that the lead singer was a guy. I'm not saying this to just say it, I was actually seriously surprised that this person was a dude. There's this affectation in his voice that screams "I really want to be like _____ and sound like _________" but I can't fill in the blanks. All I hear is that he is really really conscious of how his voice is coming out and is aiming for this awkward, turtle-ish cutesy whispermoan. A turtle in is what comes to mind; or maybe, a gerbil. I'm not sure.

Ten Songs No Man Should Own

Thu, 09 Apr 2009 02:13:00 -0400

When I was a child my father had to teach me the proper way for a man to cross his legs. I crossed them, he said, like a broad. The same went for the way I looked at my nails, I held my fingers out, stretched apart, under close scrutiny. In high school I was the product of my generation and, like most teenage boys, wore bitch pants and sometimes, just sometimes, red fingernail polish. I like to believe that most of those rather queer style choices are in the past, though sometimes I still catch myself crossing my legs like a broad and there is always a pair of bitch pants in my closet waiting to be brought back out to the light but for the most part, I have rid myself of those questionable characterstics that did nothing but raise eyebrows. One, however, still and always will remain: my guilty pleasure in music. I enjoy the sort of music that only women should listen to and sometimes only the kind of women who have just had their hearts broken. I listen to it and, if no one is around, I sing to it. These are ten of my favorite songs which no man should own.

Mixtape from http://favtape.com/daklos/TenSongsNoManShouldOwn

Upcoming Albums Whose Titles Speak For Themselves

Sun, 05 Apr 2009 03:10:00 -0400

Audience of One - Heather Headley

Scream - Chris Cornell

B.O.M.B - Busta Rhymes

Years of Refusal - Morrissey

Out of Our Minds - Melissa Auf de Maur

The E.N.D - Black Eyed Peas

Keep It Hid - Dan Auerbach

PROTIPS: Katy Perry Edition

Sun, 05 Apr 2009 02:29:00 -0400

Grammy-nominated multi-instrumentalist Katy Perry has broken into the pop charts at a rapid pace since her emergence in late 2007 with the digital EP featuring “Ur So Gay.” This article is for the rest of us looking for pointers on achieving the widespread success artists such as Katy Perry enjoy. So grab a pen and paper, get ready to take some notes and really take these tips to heart.

PROTIP #1: Being Christian ≠ MTV

Watch Video

So you’ve made the plunge into the Christian music business. It’s a lucrative business model and a solid outlet for expressing your faith, and your pastor parents are very supportive and ecstatic. Your 2001 Christian pop album featuring such songs as “Faith Won’t Fail” received modest success among the Gospel market. However, you have realized God music does not sell as much as boner music, and that’s okay. Sometimes Faith does Fail, and when it does, it’s totally hot and rad and stuff.

PROTIP #2: Bicuriosity is HOT

Watch Video

Of course, if you are going to take a dip into the mainstream pop market, something needs to distinguish your music from the others — some thing has to get you noticed — some type of buzz-garnering gimmick. A gimmick such as homosexuality. Homosexuality and bisexuality are, at best, an earnest method at which to gain boners and giggles across the world. Much like feigning lesbian interaction for attention at high school after-prom parties, references to such behavior can gain attention on the pop charts as well. However, make sure to include distinct references to the fact that you really are straight, you were just “curious.” Actual lesbianism is icky gross, so, like, but it’s hot, you know.

If anyone questions the subject matter of the song, assure them the song is about appreciating “the magical beauty of a woman.” Immediately follow the statement with “no, seriously.”

Additionally, make sure to use the word ‘gay’ not as a sexual orientation, but as a major diss. It’s like saying someone’s lame, except they like it in the butt, so lol. Don’t worry about those losers who claim you’re promoting homophobia and the negative stereotyping of the homosexual community — they’re just super gay and totally won’t admit it.

PROTIP #3: Lyrics are like the things in your head that you think and then say

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Having trouble writing lyrics? It’s okay, it’s hard. Try to think of lyrics more as things you’d say to your friends on AIM when you totally find out via Facebook that that bitch is kinda flirting with Sam when you totally said you had the hots for him first. Freeform writing will achieve the best results; write the first thing that comes in to your mind. For example, “You PMS like a bitch I would know” — alternatively, you can go for the jugular with “you’re so sad maybe you should buy a happy meal.” Both exhibit inevitable truth well-known by all junior high students, enhancing the accessibility of your music.

If you find your lyrics are lacking, hire a legendary songwriter such as Max Martin, writer of hits for the Backstreet Boys, N*SYNC, Britney Spears, and P!nk. However, only allow him to write lyrics for a portion, such as a well-written, consistent, catchy chorus. The contrast between his lyrics and your lyrics shouldn’t be too apparent and more than likely will not highlight any flaws in your songwriting skills — but if anyone suggests so, they are more than likely just super gay.

PROTIP #4: Product Placement = BUCK$$$

In this day and age, profits for musicians are shrinking and shrinking. Despite #1 Billboard hits in more than 22 countries and an album with Gold status in the US with more than 1.2 million copies sold worldwide, sometimes just a little more profit is needed to make ends meet. There are many subtle and effective ways to go about this, but the coolest is product placement. Not only does it gain the big bucks, but most viewers are so like dumb and stuff they won’t even notice. So really, why not do it? Nobody will know. It’s common practice for singer-songwriters with any integrity, such as Britney, Madonna and Christina.

Hopefully these protips will help you achieve your dreams in worldwide success like the adorable, bicurious (but not really ick lol) Katy Perry. Employing these tips, you too can achieve #1 singles across the globe, averting the damage from your wallet to your character and reputation instead.

underrated: harry nilsson

Sun, 05 Apr 2009 02:11:00 -0400

Watch Video

Harry Nilsson, often credited simply as ‘Nilsson’, was an American singer-songwriter who is mostly known for such hits at ‘Everybody’s Talkin’, the song featured in the 1969 film Midnight Cowboy, or the playful tune ‘Coconut’, rumoured to be about abortion, which was parodied in the infamous Coca-Cola ad.

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His style was eclectic and it is not uncommon for the fans of one album to be the critics of another. He had covered many hits, in his own way, from the melodramatic rendition of Badfinger’s Without You to his piano driven take on Three Dog Night’s One. His own lyrics were often blunt and crass, if not also laced with a dark, cynical humor that was not appreciated by his more conservative following who enjoyed his take on classics such as “As Times Goes Bye” and “Over the Rainbow”.

I suppose all that needs to be said about Harry Nilsson can be found in this short anecdote:

Once, during an interview, John Lennon was asked who he considers to be the greatest living American musican.

Nilsson, he replied.

The interviewer turned and asked Paul McCartney the same question.

Nilsson, he replied.

Harry Nilsson covered plenty of the Beatles material and even recorded once or twice with John Lennon.

Despite being notoriously shy, which lead to very few live performances, Nilsson broke out of his comfort zone, shortly after Lennon was shot and killed, to speak in favor of stricter gun laws and regulations.

In 1994 he died of a heart attack.

Best Song: 1941 (Semi-Autobiographical track which mirrors his own story of abandonment with the opening lines ‘well, in 1941 the happy father had a son and in 1944 the father walked right out the door’)

Best Album: Harry (Okay, maybe not his BEST album but definitely the best album to start out with. It introduces the listener to what makes Harry Nilsson unique without overstaying its welcome.)

PROTIPS: Kid Rock Edition

Sun, 05 Apr 2009 00:03:00 -0400

Last October, Kid Rock topped the charts with his first release in 4 years, modestly titled Rock N’ Roll Jesus. The self-proclaimed music deity instantly hit #1 with the album on the Billboard 200 chart. The current single, “All Summer Long,” swooped into the Billboard Hot 100, eventually reaching #1, certified platinum by the RIAA. The second single, “Amen,” reached #11 on mainstream rock and #27 on Modern Rock stations.

Clearly we have some learning to do from Mr. Rock, so I’ve analyzed the “All Summer Long” hit single along with the second single, “Amen” and I’ve come up with some Protips to live by to achieve success. NOTE: For a context to these tips/maximum learning potential, I recommend view the videos first.

CHAPTER 1: ~~WEREWOLVES IN LONDON~~
SWEET HOME ALABAMA
ALL SUMMER LONG

Watch Video

PROTIP1: Efficiency. Don’t waste your time writing a chord progression or anything like that. Take two memorable hooks from classic rock hits and combine them. One’s your verse, the other’s the chorus. Efficient, time-saving, and technically upon release your song is already two classic songs. Bam.

PROTIP2: Rhyme only when convenient. For example, rhyming “things” with “things.” No specific scheme needed; again, timewaster.

PROTIP3: Use the word “internet” in your lyrics.

CHAPTER 2: AMEN

Watch Video

PROTIP4: Audience relation should always be at the forefront of a songwriter’s mind. It’s important to write a song with the intention of making the audience rise up with fists in the air and proclaim:
A) “YEAH!”
B) “HELL YEAH!”
C) “AMERICA!”
D) “I AGREE/SYMPATHIZE WITH THESE STATEMENTS!”

Examples of statements which stir listeners to these actions:
A) starving kids dying in Africa
B) soldiers dying in the Middle East
C) just let me smoke my weed

Showing various everyday American families in their natural territory also boosts up the “HELL YEAH” count.

Fact: The number of “HELL YEAH”s is directly translatable into iTunes purchase stats.

PROTIP5: Ensure listeners that despite your blasphemous album title, you are a man of faith. Example: “God damnit, I’m scared to send my children to church.”

PROTIP6: Showing 9/11 = 5 additional spot-boosts up the Billboard charts. If you don’t see the chart boost occur within 5-7 business days please contact Toby Keith at 1-800-AMERICA.

That’s all I’ve got for Kid Rock Protips, but hopefully I’ve helped you learn how to achieve fuller success and gain the status of the son of God, musically.

HELL YEAH!
-Alex Benson

Neil Young

Fri, 03 Apr 2009 05:39:00 -0400

So many years ago Neil Young stated, in the iconic song ‘Hey Hey, My My’ that it is “better to burn out than to fade away”.

With the release of his new album ‘Fork In The Road’, we learn that he wasn’t kidding.